Tuesday, January 26, 2010

ABOUT TIME!

Oh, the pressure’s on!
Oprah will not be doing her show after 9-9-11!
And according to the Mayans and Nostradamus  . . .
The world will end . . .
In 2012!
So . . .
I HAVE to get my books published by then otherwise there’ll be no Oprah or her book club to promote it.
And worse . . .
There won’t be any people to read it.
And worse yet . . .
When I have to reckon and account for my life I can see me standing before the judgment seat.
“Em, you were a good wife and mother, but did you use all the talents you were given?  
“Yes! I wrote. Several books!”
“Wrote yes, but you never got published, did you?”
“But the world ended before I could . . .
“So, you missed the deadline?”
“Uh, yeah, but . . .
“You had ample time though, didn’t you?”
“Yes, but . . .
“You did hear the predictions years before the end came, didn’t you?”
“Well, yes, but . . .
“Oh? Is there someone else you want to blame for not getting published?”
“Well, no but . . .
“And you had all the tools?”
“Tools?
“You had a computer.”
“Yes but . . .
“And the Internet for research.”
“Yes but . . .
“Just think of all the authors decades ago who didn’t have all of these tools.”
“Yeah but . . .
“And still they pursued and got published.”
“Yes but. . .
“I think you know you had every opportunity to get published and yet you squandered your time.”
“Squandered?”
“Did you have to take every phone call while you were writing?”
“Well, no but . . .
“And playing Spider Solitaire? Did that further your writing career along?”
“No, but . . .
“And all that research on creams for your face. Did that help?”
“No, but . . .
“I could go on and on, but I hope you’re getting my point.”
“Yes. I get it. What will my punishment be?”
“Oh, I think you already know.”
“I do?”
“You will now have all of eternity to look back and see just how much time you wasted.”
“Are there no second chances?”
“Well, if you push it, I mean work really hard, Oprah is having another show that starts in January 2011.”
“But I thought the Mayan calendar . . .
"The Mayan calendar ends in 2012, not the world. The Mayans wrote about the world 400 million years from now."
"And Nostradamus' predictions?"
"Vague at best."
"So the world really hasn't come to an end?”
“Em, snap out of it! This is your blog talking.”
“Oh, ha ha, I uh . . .
“Wasting more time are you?”
“Uh, no, I uh . . .
“GET TO WORK!”
 "OK."

Always, Em-Musing

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